I took today off sick because I felt that life had got a bit on top of me again. This is now the sixth day I’ve had off sick this year. My contract says I will be paid for ten, but I still feel like I’m taking too much time off. Work is a pain at the moment anyway because my manager is on holiday and the customer is expecting me to do his job to keep them happy. Unfortunately, I’m not a manager and I don’t have the authority to make things happen. I’m also pretty demotivated by being unhappy at work, so… I’m not exactly going above and beyond here.

I do still feel a bit off it, though, which I think is the citalopram. I only took it to deal with work so it’s fair that my employer absorbs the cost of me not feeling well.

I feel content and perhaps slightly relieved that I’ve chosen not to continue with it. I think I had been stressing myself over whether or not to take it. It might have helped but it raised so much long term uncertainty.

Now I feel like I’ve worked my way through that crisis.

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